Page 24 of Sparks of Insanity
“Mum, I just need some time on my own, and I promise I’m not doing anything stupid. I’m eighteen. I need to start growing up a bit.”
It took another five minutes to convince her, but finally, I was driving away from the house, and it seemed like weight was leaving my shoulders by the mile, as I drove away.
I could go anywhere, or do anything, or at least for as long as there was fuel in the car. It wasn’t like I had money to throw away on fuel, because being eighteen, and choosing not to go into further education, meant I should be getting a job and working.
Blaze did, and he was doing great with his IT skills, even the illegal stuff, or maybe especially that stuff. Actually, that reminded me of something, so I dialled his phone on my handsfree.
“Yo, what’s up, little sis?” His voice always made me feel safer, because Blaze had always looked out for me.
“Hey, I’m out driving, check me out.” He whooped at the expected moment, but then he cursed.
“But you have me on handsfree, right? Don’t make me lock that shit down for you.”
Ha, perfect. He’d just walked right into my trap, hadn’t he?
“Actually, on that subject, I need your help. Can you remove all the blocks on my tech, so I can be free like you are?”
Another quiet curse, as I headed down a familiar road, heading for Ethan’s home. I drove past it the first time, just checking to see if it looked like anything had changed. No ‘for sale’ sign, or anything like that. Hopefully it was a good sign.
“Em, you know I was the one who had to set up that stuff after you know what. You’re asking me to go behind our parents’ backs now?”
I turned the corner, and parked the car under a tree.
“Blaze, please. I’m eighteen. I should be able to use my technology freely, or do I need to go out and steal new ones, just to have my freedom? You want me to risk getting arrested?”
“Dammit, you’re too good at manipulation. Fine. I’m sorting it out, but don’t go telling anyone, right? I’ve got important shit going down here, I’ve got a baby to worry about, and I need no more trouble coming my way.” Him and Anneka and their damn baby. It was all anyone cared about. And I knew for a fact that he’d done some awful stuff to her, when he first got together with her. More than any of the family knew I’d overheard. Eavesdropping is useful that way. You can learn a hell of a lot.
“I promise, thanks, bro. I need to go though, talk to you later.”
I ended the call and sat in the car for about twenty minutes, debating going down the road to look for Ethan.
Ethan
THEY SAY ALL KINDS of bullshit things about how life always gets better, and one door closing and another opening, and all that crap, but you know what? It’s not true. I’d hit rock bottom, and every now and then, I fell another level lower.
I lost my job over what happened with Ember, and then I got turned down for every job I applied for in teaching, because that information was on the public record. There were never any charges against me, and nothing was proven, but the rumours and accusations were enough.
My career was completely fucked, and I had to find a new dream now. In addition to that, I’d lost two friends over it, because they couldn’t afford to be associated with the teacher who’d interfered with his vulnerable student. Their fucking words, not mine. I never actually touched Ember, aside from a couple of hugs. That kiss? That washerkissing me, but it was enough to destroy me.
I wanted to get the hell out of town, and start afresh somewhere else, but guess what? When you suddenly lose your only source of income, you’re not really able to move and buy a place elsewhere, or even rent one, because you have no income to rely on. I was stuck in the house I was in, until the money in my savings ran out, and then I’d be effectively homeless. I was looking at jobs in coffee shops and the like now, just to keep my head above water.
The occasional bottle of red wine was my only luxury now, and I had to drink it alone, because Suzy had effectively cut me out of her life too. I still didn’t know why, but it had happened just after the kiss that was interrupted by Ember’s brick through my window, so maybe that was enough to scare her off.
Loneliness was crushing me, and when there was a knock on my door, after half a bottle of wine, I was grateful just for whoever the hell it was, even if they were a wrong address, orsomething. I pulled the door open, and all at once I was frozen in shock.
“Hi Ethan,” Ember said shyly, smiling up at me in that sweet way she always had. What the hell was she doing here though? I glanced up and down the street, because her being seen here would be the final fucking straw.
“You can’t be here,” I finally said, moving to close the door in her face, even though it was out of character for me to be rude or dismissive to anyone. Welcome to the new me. Unemployed, facing homelessness, and now a social pariah.
“Please! Let me just talk with you for a moment?” With a frustrated growl, I grabbed her arm and dragged her into the house, closing the door before anyone could see her there. She smiled brightly, easing her dark coat off, and draping it over the armchair as she headed into my living room.
“You’re not a guest here, Em. You can’t stay, but I can’t have people seeing you here either.” I was deliberately being unfriendly, and firm, but even with the risks of being seen with her, it was a relief to have someone to talk to, anyone. She looked well too, and that reminded me of what she’d been through, and what I’d accidentally put her through.
“Can I sit for a minute? I wanted to apologise for what happened,” she said, dropping onto my sofa and picking up my half-full wine glass. She took a sip, before I reached out and snatched it from her. I had one damn glass left and then I was out. She wasn’t taking this from me too. Nor was I taking the blame for a teen alcoholic falling off the damn wagon, on top of everything else.
“It’s a little late for apologies, Em,” I said bitterly, downing the remainder of my wine. That’s it, I’m out now. That made me more pissed off than ever, because it was my one fucking pleasure right now.
She rubbed her hands down her thighs, a nervous gesture I’d seen before, because I’d spent so much time with her that I’d learned her cues and responses well. She was wearing a short black skirt with a white blouse, and a black vest over it. I shouldn’t have been cataloguing her clothing, but I needed to keep my wits about me, and focusing on details was helping.
