Page 63 of In Safe Hands
“Yes.” Making a face, Daisy explained, “I figured that might keep Dad from sleeping with this one.” Chris laughed. “And this guy was really highly recommended.”
“Do you like him?” he asked, sitting on the other side of the couch and angling his body so he could look at her.
“I do.” Daisy tucked her bare feet underneath her. “We didn’t talk about anything too intense today, since it was kind of a get-to-know-you session, but he seemed really relaxed and laid-back. He didn’t have that condescending psychiatrist thing going, either.”
“That’s great.” His grin was open, without even a hint of the weirdness that had been popping up lately. “I’m proud of you, Dais.”
“Thanks.” She bounced a little. “Ready for Fists?”
With a mock-groan, Chris turned toward the flat-screen mounted on the wall. “Am I ready for horrible fighting technique and cheesy dialog? Sure. Hit me. I mean it. Hit me hard enough that I pass out and miss this movie.”
With an amused snort, Daisy ignored his moaning and started the DVD. “Whatever. I know you’re dying to see it.”
Although he gave a huff of denial, she noticed that Chris’s eyes were already fixed on the screen. Grinning, she settled back to watch the movie.
* * *
“I’m feeling a violent need to punch her.” Daisy jammed a spoonful of brownie sundae into her mouth. “Why is she just standing there while her boyfriend is pummeled?”
Chris smirked at her. “Pummeled?”
“Yes, pummeled. Thrashed, beaten, ganged-up on, smacked-down, trampled.” With a groan, she closed her eyes. “And now she’s screaming. Great. That’s really helpful.”
“Why are you acting like you’ve never seen this movie before?” He bit into his brownie. Unlike Daisy, he preferred to have his dessert straight, without ice cream and hot fudge. “We must’ve watched this fifty times.”
She shrugged. “I always forget how useless Taylor is until her stupid screams remind me. I mean, look.” Daisy pointed at the screen. “Those three guys have their backs to her. No one’s paying attention to her. She could take those guys out easily.”
“Easy for you, maybe,” Chris said mildly. “But you have skills.”
“Mad skills,” she agreed, making him laugh. “Even if she’s clueless, though, she should at least try something. Call for help, even. I know she has that stupid bejeweled cell phone in her pocket, since she was just texting her friend in the last scene.”
“Don’t judge until you’ve been there,” he said, focusing on the still-screaming woman on the screen. “You never know how you’ll react until you’re in the middle of a life-threatening situation. Your brain and body do some crazy stuff in crisis mode—most of it not helpful.”
“I know.” Putting her bowl on the coffee table, she tucked herself into the corner of the couch and hugged her knees. Although she was sure Chris hadn’t meant them to hurt, his words gutted her with their accuracy. When it had mattered, when she could’ve acted and saved her mom, she’d been just like Taylor—useless. Maybe that was why she hated the character so much.
Daisy stared at the screen as the attackers fled and Taylor threw herself on her boyfriend’s limp body. Normally, this was the point where Daisy mocked the woman’s lack of first-aid skills and ranted to Chris about how her clutching the semiconscious man had probably just aggravated a spinal injury, but Daisy wasn’t seeing the movie anymore. She was sixteen and huddled in the corner of Miller’s Convenience Store, trying to hide behind a display of individually wrapped Little Debbie snack cakes.
“Dais.” Chris must have moved, since he was right next to her. Cupping her face with both of his hands, he tipped her head so she had to look at him. “I’m sorry. That was a stupid thing to say.”
“No. You’re right. I just sat there and did nothing to help her.” It was too hard to keep eye contact when Chris looked at her like that, with so much kindness and sympathy that she didn’t deserve. Her gaze shifted to his left eyebrow. “I even screamed at exactly the wrong time. I wasn’t just useless like Taylor; I was destructive.”
Despite her effort to avoid his eyes, he moved his head slightly so she couldn’t help but meet them. His fingers tightened, not quite enough to hurt. “Your mom was just shot in front of you. I think you’re allowed to scream.” His voice was rough, as if something was caught in his throat.
“No.” Since he wasn’t letting her dodge his gaze, she closed her eyes completely. She’d held these words inside of her for eight years and, now that she’d started letting them out, she couldn’t seem to stop. “It was a second before he pulled the trigger. I startled him. I screamed, and he shot, and she fell. That’s how it went.”
“No. No, that’s not how it went. Daisy, look at me.” Although she really didn’t want to open her eyes, it was hard for her to deny him anything, especially when he was being so serious, so intense. She met his gaze. “I was there, Dais. I was there, and that’s not how things went down.”
A remote part of her brain was touched that Chris would lie to try to make her feel better, but she couldn’t duck the responsibility of what she’d done. “It was, Chris. I see it happen every night.”
“Oh, Dais.” It was Chris’s turn to close his eyes, and when he opened them again, his expression was fierce. “You’re not the only one watching the reruns. I was the first deputy on scene after the call went out.”
“Did someone outside see what was going on?” she asked. “I always wondered how you got there so fast.”
He frowned. “Didn’t anyone tell you what happened?”
She tugged on his wrists, and he released her. It felt good to be touching him, though, so she shifted her hands and tangled her fingers with his. “I never wanted to discuss it—or even think about it. Besides, people probably figured I already knew, since I was there.” There in the corner, screaming at just the wrong time.
Her explanation didn’t seem to placate him. “I’m sorry, Dais. I should’ve told you a long time ago, but you always used to walk away when I tried to bring it up, and I…well, I hated talking about it, too. I didn’t realize you were blaming yourself all these years. The clerk pushed the emergency button under the counter, and Dispatch sent out the call that an alarm had been triggered at Miller’s Convenience Store. I was only a block away, so I was the first deputy on scene. Almost all of those types of calls end up being false alarms, but I’d only been working as a deputy for six months, so my heart started beating fast. I’d been on my own for just three weeks after finishing my probationary training period, and I hadn’t had time to get bitter and jaded yet.”
