Page 157 of What are the Risks
“It’s healing,” Noah bit, still sounding seriously pissed.
“I’m sorry that Ryker did that.”
With a heavy exhale, Noah dropped his shoulders. “I was drunk and saying things I shouldn’t have. While it was a dick move and totally uncalled for, I guess I can see why he did it.”
It wasn’t an apology as such, but at least Noah had acknowledged he’d been an asshole. That’s as good as it was going to get.
“I won’t be pressing charges,” he added. “So you can stop worrying about that.”
I mentally breathed a sigh of relief. After the silence over the last few weeks, I’d assumed as much, but hearing it was reassuring.
With that settled, I steered the conversation away from Ryker and me before Noah could fixate on it. He wasn’t mature enough to talk about my new relationship – if you could even call it that – and I had zero interest in starting an argument.
“How were your final months of college?”
Noah gave a half-hearted shrug. “I got over it by the end. I was keen to leave the party scene behind, you know.”
“Sure,” I numbly nodded, doing my best to play nice.
It felt like he was hoping that would impress me, and it broke my heart that he thought he still had a chance.
“I’ve got some of your stuff in my car,” I said.
“Oh.”
“Yeah. I cleaned out my bedroom today. Just a few sweaters and things.”
“Right.” He raked his fingers through his styled hair. “Sorry, I haven’t sorted through my room yet–”
“It’s fine.”
I couldn’t think of anything in particular that I missed, so whatever he might have clearly wasn’t something I needed.
As Noah opened his mouth to say something, he paused, checking over his shoulder. I probably should have chosen somewhere more private to meet up. The odds of bumping into a familiar face here were high. It was the best coffee shop going around.
I could only guess what people from our high school were saying about Noah and me. And Ryker and me. And Ryker and Noah. And Ryker and Noah and me. We were probably the talk of the town.
Frankly, I couldn’t care less. Let them gossip, speculate and spread theories. I’d add it to my list of reasons not to move back.
“I’m so sorry, Ruby,” Noah said, leaning forward on his elbows. “I’ll never be able to apologise enough. I hate that I ruined our relationship. It will always be the biggest regret of my life.” He paused, emotion catching in his throat. “If there’s anything I can ever do to even slightly make up for everything, please tell me, because I can’t stand the idea of you hating me.”
“Noah, I don’t...”
I trailed off. The pain on his face was as raw as it had been when I’d burst into his frat room. It was as if his world was still collapsing, and it pulled at my heartstrings,as if a harpist was strumming inside my chest.
As he craned his neck over his shoulder once more, checking for prying ears, I caught sight of a distinct hickey beneath his left ear. Noah must’ve noticed my eyes bulge, because he quickly placed his hand over it, subtly tugging up his collar.
And just like that, my sympathy was gone in a fucking instant.
“What was it like the first time you kissed another girl?” I asked.
“Ruby–”
“I’m not asking to start a fight. I’m asking because for me... it’s like the stars were aligning. And I keep wondering if it was just because it was someone other than you, or because that person was the right person.”
Noah’s gaze darkened. “You mean Ryker?”
As tempting as it was to avert my gaze to avoid the pain in Noah’s eyes, I didn’t look away.
