Page 17 of Defying the Crown
Ella nodded, her expression serene. I feel myself beginning to lose control, and Ella reaches over quickly with a gentle expression and grasps my arm lovingly.
"Harry, it's okay. We'll get through this together, just like we always do."
I gulped, struggling to find the words and managing only a faint murmur. "I... I don't know if I can do this, Ells. Not after what happened last time."
"You can, and you will. We'll prepare, we'll practice, and we'll make sure everything goes smoothly. I'll be right there with you, every step of the way."
I manage a nod, and Erik quickly launches into the minutiae of the event - the guest list, the menu, the entertainment. But his words faded into a distant buzz as my mind raced with worst-case scenarios. What if I said the wrong thing again? What if I embarrassed myself in front of all those important people?
My chest tightened, and I could feel my breathing growing shallow. I clenched my fists under the table, trying to ground myself. But the more Erik talked, the more overwhelming it all seemed.
Ella glanced over at me, her brow furrowing with concern. She reached out and gave my hand a gentle squeeze, anchoring me back to the present.
"It sounds like a lovely event, Erik," she said smoothly. "I'm sure Harald and I will do our best to represent the family well."
I nodded mutely, grateful for her intervention. But even as Erik moved on to other topics, I couldn't shake the sense of dread that had settled in the pit of my stomach. Another high-profile event, another opportunity for me to embarrass myself and my family. How was I ever going to survive this?
Erik
I couldn't avoid noticing the fatigue etched onto Harald's face as I stepped into the room where he and Ella were quietly having their morning meal. He moved sluggishly, his eyes half-open, and he poked at his food without much enthusiasm, barely taking a bite. A pang of worry struck me - Harald had been through so much lately, and it pained me to witness him struggling like this, day after day. I wished there was more I could do to ease his burdens.
As I discreetly observed him, trying not to stare too obviously, I couldn't help but ponder what had him so drained and exhausted. Could it be the stress of the most recent gaffe eating away at him? Or perhaps it was something else entirely, some other worry or problem that he hadn't confided in me about?
A thought abruptly crossed my mind then - could it be that Harald had been up late into the night, conversing with someone? Chatting or texting with a friend, or perhaps something more? The idea sent a twinge of... something unpleasant through me. Jealousy, perhaps? No, that couldn't be accurate. I cared for Harald deeply, and I wanted nothing more than for him to be happy and content, even if his affections and attentions lay elsewhere, with someone else. Still, the notion of him connecting with someone, opening up to them, even if only through a screen, gave me a tiny glimmer of hope amidst my selfish feelings.
Harald had been so consumed lately by his duties, his anxiety, and the weight of his father's expectations constantly bearing down on him. Maybe this new person, whoever they were, was providing him a much-needed outlet - someone he could truly be himself with, without fear of judgment or disappointment. The very thought of Harald finding that kind of solace and comfort warmed my heart, even as I felt the cold tinge of jealousy cut through me. I knew I needed to set aside my own unrequited feelings, and simply be glad that he had found a small slice of happiness, in whatever form it took. Harald deserved that and so much more, even if I could never be the one to give it to him.
I cleared my throat softly, hating to interrupt the siblings' quiet morning together, but knowing I had important news to deliver. "Your Highnesses, I apologize for the intrusion, but I have some information about an upcoming event that requires your attention."
Ella looked up at me with a warm smile, always the picture of grace and poise. "Of course, Erik. What's the event?"
I glanced down at my tablet, double-checking the details. "It's the annual charitable gala, ma'am. It's scheduled for tomorrow, and the royal family's attendance is expected, as always."
As I spoke, I couldn't help but notice Harald's reaction out of the corner of my eye. His already pale face seemed to drain of all remaining color, and his eyes widened with what I could only describe as sheer panic. My heart clenched at the sight, knowing all too well the reasons behind his distress.
Ella, ever the observant and protective sister, immediately reached out and placed a comforting hand on Harald's arm. "Harry, it's okay. We'll get through this together, just like we always do."
Harald swallowed hard, his voice barely above a whisper as he responded. "I... I don't know if I can do this, Ells. Not after what happened last time."
I felt a surge of sympathy for him, recalling the disastrous events of the previous fundraiser all too vividly. The embarrassment, the humiliation, the way his father had berated him afterwards... it was no wonder he was hesitant to put himself in that position again.
Ella's grip on his arm tightened, her voice firm but gentle. "You can, and you will. We'll prepare, we'll practice, and we'll make sure everything goes smoothly. I'll be right there with you, every step of the way."
"It sounds like a lovely event, Erik," Ella said smoothly. "I'm sure Harald and I will do our best to represent the family well."
As I watched the siblings interact, I couldn't help but marvel at the strength of their bond. Ella truly was Harald's rock, his unwavering support system, and I knew that with her by his side, he could face anything. Even so, I silently vowed to do everything in my power to make this gala a success, to shield Harald from any further pain or embarrassment. He deserved nothing less.
I took a deep breath, straightening my tie in the mirror one last time before heading out to the waiting car with Ella. My stomach churned with anxiety as we rode to the gala, my mind replaying the mortifying mistake from the last event on loop. Ella reached over and squeezed my hand.
"You've got this, Harry. We practiced your speech a dozen times. It's going to be great."
I gave her a tight smile, wishing I had even a fraction of her confidence. "Thanks Ells. I just hope I don't freeze up and forget everything again."
We arrived at the gala to a barrage of flashing cameras. I plastered on my public smile, waving to the press as we made our way inside. Father was already there, speaking with the event organizers. He glanced our way, his expression stern as always. I felt myself shrinking under his critical gaze.
The gala was in full swing, a glittering throng of wealthy donors and influential figures. Servers wove through the crowd with trays of champagne and hors d'oeuvres. I accepted a glass, hoping it would calm my nerves. Ella and I made the rounds, smiling and making polite conversation.
I felt my phone buzz in my pocket and stole a glance at the screen. It was a message from Daniel, reminding me not to worry and just be myself. Despite everything, I felt myself smiling. His words of encouragement from earlier echoed in my mind. I took a fortifying sip of champagne, drawing strength from the knowledge that someone out there believed in me, even if they didn't know the real me.
