Page 16 of Destined for the Devil
"Oh.” She lowered her voice. "I'm sorry. Thank you." Her eyes averting mine like the plague, she picked up the thong and gently folded it. “I did laundry this afternoon, so...I must have missed this one." Her hands behind her back now, she bit her lip, visibly fighting with her smile.
"It's okay." I shrugged and made it sound simple even though it was anythingbutsimple in my mind. "I picked it out. I like this one." Yes, I did. I would have also really liked to take it off her—stop. Stop. Don’t think that.
Isla nodded and broke out into a devious smile. "Uh huh. It's a nice one." She finally looked up at me, and oh my God, her eyes pierced minelike a thousand knives. Fuck. Me.
What the fuck was I feeling for this girl?Whythe hell was I feeling anything? I didn't feel. Isla was like opium, drugging me with every second of her presence and sending me into a euphoric and relaxed state. Slowly but surely, I had the urge to feel that high again, and the only way I could do that would be in her presence.
She swayed her body side to side in discomfort as we just stood in front of each other like awkward teenagers. This was so silly. I was thirty-five, anadultman, and here I was feeling sixteen years old, unable to take a deep breath as I stood in front of someone I had a crush on.
"Alright, I'll see you later.” I blurted out and turned away within an instant, trying to create as much distance between us as possible.
After an hour of searching the entire apartment, I didn't find the damn thing and was feeling annoyed, angry, and deeply disappointed that I lost it. Amazing. No cufflink, and now Isla's red thong stood in front of my eyes every time I blinked.
Once the city was enveloped in darkness, I grabbed a seat on the patio and set up my hookah. Should I have asked Isla to come join me? Obviously, I desperately wanted to. Obviously, it was the only courteous thing to do.Obviously,that was a very dangerous road to take.
Isla sitting beside me in total privacy and the dim lights of my patio? Perfect. Perfect atmosphere to place my lips on hers and finally taste her. Perfect place to have her straddle me while I ran my hands all over her body. Perfect time to tell her how incredibly hung up and obsessed I was with her.
No. Stop. I had to bring it back to reality; what was I doing? Yes. The tobacco.
I closed my eyes and inhaled a lungful of smoke, listening to nothing, and desperately ransacking my brain for thoughts that would distract me from that thong on Isla’s body.
I reminisced about all the times I smoked hookah in Russia. Every time I went back, I had a great time. Parties, girls, alcohol, total freedom. But none of those thoughts made me excited or happy. I didn't want to do any of that shit anymore; I only wanted—
"Good evening." A gentle voice startled me, and I ripped my eyes open to see angel Isla standing at the sliding doors, her hair down but wearing the same all-white outfit. "I'm sorry, did I scare you?"
Yes, Isla, you fucking petrify me with how much I want nothing else in life except to have you in my arms.
“No. What's up?" I spoke coldly and watched her tippy-toe onto the patio and come a little closer.
"I have something of yours too. I think it's yours at least. It has your initials." With a mysterious smile on her face, she stretched out her hand, the cupcake cufflink with the pink frosting resting easily between her fingers.
"Oh my God! Where did you find it?!" I sat up as if electrocuted, not realizing how ridiculous I must have looked. Isla only giggled at my reaction while my eyes were glued to the cufflink in her hand.
"I think the lady that comes to clean thought it was mine. I found it on my dresser when I was getting ready for bed."
She dropped the cufflink in my hand, joy and relief seeping through all of me. Thank fuck.
"Thank you!" I burst with excitement. "I was looking for this all evening! That's how I found your thong." Oh, fuck this. "Sit. Here." I passed her the pipe once she took a half seat beside me. "Sit normally. I won't bite." But I wanted to. I wanted to land small bites on her neck. I wanted to bite her inner thigh and leave a mark.
"Um, I don't know how to smoke this." She held the pipe and eyed it apprehensively, all shy and fucking adorable. God damn it, Isla, who the hell were you?!
Holding back my smile, I explained what to do, and she followed my instructions, taking a small drag and immediately coughing. Mmm, what a sweet angel.
"Why do you have such girly cufflinks, Roman? You look like you're more into skulls and...I don't know, other manly things." Isla laughed at her own words while she sat cross-legged on the soft chair, gifting me a genuine smile.
I’m just into you at this point, Isla. Nothing else could possibly occupy my mind.
"It was a gift." I did my best to sound nice but didn’t share anymore details, the scar on my heart never having fully healed.
"Oh. Well, it's cute."
In silence, I kept my eyes on how she brought the pipe to her lips again. This time, she didn't cough, but the way she blew the smoke out almost made me pass out. Fuck, she was so sensual...she was so graceful...she was so effortlessly beautiful.
I leaned back on my chair and wondered what the fuck I was supposed to do next. My obsession with her was becoming all-encompassing. It obliterated everything inside me. It was slowly driving me crazy. And she had no clue.
And truthfully, guilt screamed inside me. Isla was a good girl. A lovely, gorgeous, gentle, and kind girl, and someone likemehad his eye on her. This was a recipe for disaster; I knew that without any doubt.
Isla was sunshine and sensuality. She was polite, she was smart, she had goals in life, she was a whole wonderful universe, and I was nothing but a criminal. What could possibly go wrong if we linked our lives together? Everything. I didn't want to ruin her and drag her into my world, and at the same time I was slowly dying from that understanding.
