Harry’s eyes met hers and widened, and he leaped off the bed, tumbling Janette off him. Janette grabbed the sheet and held it up to her chest, white-faced.
“Ana, oh god, Ana, I thought—”
“Seriously, Harry?” she said, her voice full of contempt. “Your sad little secretary? Desperate times. I’ll be downstairs, when you’re done.”
She shut the door behind her and returned to Eliza’s room. She was already asleep, tired after the long journey. Her hands shaking, Ana gently pulled up the blanket and made her way downstairs.
Her mind was numb. She poured herself a wine and sat at the kitchen worktop, staring into space. Just one day ago she’d been so happy. How quickly things could come tumbling down.
She heard feet on the stairs, then the front door shutting.
Harry appeared in the kitchen doorway, dressed in jeans and a sweater, his hair tousled, his cheeks still pink.
“Ana, I don’t know what to say. I’m so sorry, you shouldn’t have had to see that.”
“How long has this rather pathetic... thing been going on?”
“It’s not a thing. It’s just... only once or twice. I didn’t mean for anyone to get hurt. I’m sorry.”
“So you said. You know what, Harry? If it’d been someone like Merry, I might have understood. Buther? She’s a moron. Why—”
“She’s not a moron. I realize she doesn’t have your style or your sharp brain, but she’s kind, and she understands me.”
“Did you really just say that, Harry? Sheunderstandsyou? Because she types your letters and knows how you like your coffee? And have you told her your wifedoesn’tunderstand you? Well? Have you, Harry?” Her voice rose, and finally the fury rushed in. “ANSWER ME, Harry!”
“I don’t remember saying those exact words.”
Ana picked up her wineglass and threw the contents at Harry. When they fell short, she threw the glass.
“You BASTARD!”
He ducked, and it smashed on the wall behind him. Then she picked up a plate from a pile draining by the sink, and threw that.
“You UTTER fucking BASTARD!”
As she picked up another, Harry left the kitchen and shut the door quickly. The plate smashed against it.
The red mist dissipated and she doubled over, crying great, heaving sobs. She couldn’t forget Harry’s expression of joy as he’d thrust into Janette. With Ana, his face only ever showed intense concentration.
She sank onto a stool and rested her head on her arms, tears soaking her sleeves. Her heart was breaking, shattering into pieces like the fragments of glass and china all over the floor.
A while later she sat up and took some deep breaths. Then she opened the kitchen door, swiping her wet cheeks with the palms of her hands.
“Where are you?” she called.
“Drawing room.”
He was sitting in an armchair, staring into space. “I love you, Ana,” he said. “Can we talk about this?”
“I want a divorce.”
“Ana, it was one mistake. Every marriage has its ups and downs. Things haven’t been good for a while, you know that. We can sort it, though. Do you want me to fire Janette?”
“Do what you want, Harry. I can’t spend my life worrying what you’re up to every time my back’s turned. You were unfaithful to Katie, and now you’ve been unfaithful to me. For all I know, Janette could be one of many. I can’t trust you anymore. I’m calling my lawyer tomorrow. Oh, not tomorrow, actually, because I’ll be with your sick sister. Did you know about that? No, thought not. Well, when you feel like thinking about someone other than yourself, you SELFISH BASTARD, perhaps you’d like to give her a call. But not yet, because she needs to talk to Charles first. Do you see, Harry, how when women need someone to rely on, it’s never a man?”
Trying not to care about the shock on Harry’s face, she left the room.
CHAPTER 33