Page 78 of Enemies Off Camera
“I don’t know why you’re telling me this,” I say.
“Because our dad is dying. And he loves you. He misses you. And you can’t let him leave this world carrying that guilt. You just can’t, Zara.”
I drop my head, eyes closed. Little Trey is sitting here with a big ask.
Forgive Theo? For letting his second wife treat me like a second-class citizen in my own home?
“I want to show you something, if you don’t mind,” Trey says gently, cutting through my spiraling thoughts.
I lift my head, glaring now. Thankfully, I’m not crying. I’m too angry for tears.
“What?” I snap.
“I had a conversation with our father before he got worse. It was about you. I recorded it without him knowing. And I want to show it to you.”
It’s later.Trey has gone home with a maybe from me. Maybe I’ll go see him soon—maybe. I have too much going on right now. I need to think about what I’d even say.
My father looked nothing like the man I remembered. He was thin, small, all skin and bones. Seeing him that way broke my heart. Because my dad was not mean. He was slow to anger, which was the problem. He should’ve been angry at Stacy. But at least now I know that he was—and why he never expressed it.
Trey asked him, “Dad, if you knew how my mother was, why did you stay with her? And have two more kids?”
At first I thought my father was so far gone that he didn’t comprehend Trey’s question. But then his lips trembled before he spoke.
“When Wilamina died, it all came crashing down on me. I thought I would be with her for the rest of my life. I wanted to die too. But I had… Zara.”
My dad went silent for a long time. Trey remained patiently still.
“I didn’t think I could do it alone,” my dad said. “Marrying Stacy was my biggest regret—and the best thing—because I love you kids. I worked a lot. I didn’t pay attention. I figured, she was like Wila. Soft and beautiful and kind. But… that was me not facing the truth. I want to tell her I’m sorry.”
“Who, Dad?” Trey asked.
“Zara. She got the worst of it. She was gone before I finally stood up to her.”
“Yeah, and she left.”
“And then she died,” my dad said.
Their silence loomed, and I thought that was the end until my dad finally added, “I was scared to be a single father, and that’s on me. Zara doesn’t have to forgive me. I haven’t earned her forgiveness.”
And that was the end.
I asked Trey something I hadn’t cared to know—until now. “What happened to him?”
“He caught pneumonia and then while being treated in the hospital, it turned to sepsis.”
That answer, more than any other, is what finally gets me out of bed.
I open my laptop and email Kat.
FIFTY-SIX
Friday
It’s three days before Jaxon’s next game. I’ve gone the entire week without obsessing over how heartbroken he left me. That’s a win. I’ve been hurt by a man before, and I’ll probably be hurt again—many times before it’s all over. So, I’m gutting it up. Feeling the sadness, mourning what could’ve been between me and Jaxon, and moving on.
The good news? I’ve been in constant communication with my brother Trey—and even Bloom, my twenty-two-year-old sister. We’ve decided to put our father under my health insurance through The Guild. Yesterday, he was transferred to one of the best hospitals in the world.
“He’s already improving,” Trey says, his voice breathy with movement. He’s rushing between classes. He’s in the MFT program at USC. Being a fixer suits him, and oddly, I like him a lot. I like my sisters too.
