Page 27 of The Tracker's Dawn: Sunderverse
They listened with care and no mockery, even Eric who claimed to hate discussing matters of the heart. At this point, they understood how Jake and I felt about each other and knew we wouldn’t stop until we found a solution to our problem. The strong friendship we’d all developed made them care. They didn’t want Jake and me to do something stupid and hurt ourselves in the process. They wanted us to succeed and be happy. It was the same way I felt about each of them. I’d grown to care about Eric and Damien very much.
“And are you sure there’s nothing you can do about pushing back the wedding to its original date?” Damien asked.
Jake shook his head. “I tried. Craig won’t budge. He wants to get the alliance finalized as soon as possible. The situation has him nervous.”
“He’s always been a stubborn asshole,” Eric said. “That’s why he got along so well with your grandfather.”
Sheesh!Eric had the tact of a rhinoceros sometimes.
I winced at the comment—not because I didn’t agree with him but because the old man’s death was so recent. Jake’s expression betrayed nothing, however. He was the kind to grieve privately, and though it seemed Walter’s death had hit him hard in the beginning, he quickly compartmentalized his emotions. I felt awful at the thought of him grieving alone. With Rosalina missing, I’d been no comfort to him. On the contrary, I’d been a burden, and he’d been my rock the entire time. Without him, I wouldn’t have been able to hold it together.
Smiling gently at him, I promised myself to change that.
“Have you been able to figure out a way to perform the spell?” I had given him the copy ofBlood Treaties: My life in Franceto read over and decide whether or not the demon spell would solve our problem.
Damien rubbed his chin, looking thoughtful.
“I’ve had a few ideas,” he said. “However, nothing that makes me one hundred percent confident yet. It’s a difficult spell and extremely risky for Jake. In spare moments, I’ve tried to find other alternatives, but I’m disappointed to say I haven’t run into any other incantation that would break the pact—not even remotely. So the demon spell, which is a cleansing of sorts, still seems our only viable option. Especially now that the deadline has been moved up.”
“You know, Jake,” Eric interrupted, sounding hesitant, “you can always... divorce Allison after you marry her. You could also step out on her.”
This time, Jake flashed a furious glance in Eric’s direction. Still, his voice remained even, void of anger. “The first one is not a possibility. There was a stipulation in the pact to prevent that. And the second, I would never do that to Toni.Never. I respect her and love her too much to make her a mistress. She’s my mate, Eric. My mate. I couldn’t share her with anyone, and you know the same goes for her.”
Eric waved a hand in the air. “It bore mentioning it.”
“Ihaveto break the pact, and whatever it is, whatever it takes,” Jake said, “I’m willing to do it.”
I shook my head. “Not if it’s reckless.”
His clear eyes connected with mine across the table. His expression was unfamiliar to me, etched with emotions I didn’t recognize. It unsettled me because I’d thought I knew him well enough to read him like an open book.
“I’m sorry, Toni,” he said, “but it’s my decision.”
The words felt like a blow. My anger surged. “So I don’t have a say?!”
Eric twisted uncomfortably in his chair.
“We can discuss this later,” Jake said.
“No! We’ll discuss it now!”
He rubbed the back of his neck, looking resigned. “Okay.” He stared pointedly at me, inviting me to begin the discussion, with the same even temperament as with Eric.
My mouth opened and closed a few times before I eloquently blurted out, “You can’t die.”
“And I can’t live without you.”
“B-but you’re sayingIcan. Because if the spell goes wrong that’s what I’ll be doing... living without you.”
“And what if I don’t try, Toni? What if I marry Allison without taking the risk? What kind of lives would we live, huh? I would forever hate myself for being a coward, and you would, too. Soon enough. I don’t want that.” His eyes wavered slightly. “I would rather you love my memory than hate my worthless living ass.”
“I wouldn’t hate you.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“Yes. I’m sure, and you want to know why? Because after you left me, I tried. For almost two years, I told myself that I was over you, that I hated your guts. And see how well that worked out?”
“Maybe you’re right,” he conceded. “But I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. What would be the point? Put yourself in my shoes, Toni.”
