Page 32 of Before We Break Again
“I’m going to help him,” I say, more to myself than to Hayes.My voice wavers, but I push through.“Not as his doctor, but as his ...I’m going to help him.”
“Good.I’ll handle the medical side, but the rest?That’s going to take more than surgery and rehab.”Hayes speaks again, his voice softer, almost fatherly.“He needs people who love him.I’m happy to hear he has you as part of his support system.And if you ever need a job, you’ve got one with me.”
I nod, even though he can’t see me.“Thank you, Hayes.For everything.”
“Anytime.We’ll have a position for you within the clinic or the hospital,” he says, his voice warm, reassuring.“And Halsey?Don’t burn yourself out trying to save everyone.You matter too.”
I close my eyes, the knot in my throat tightening again, but I manage to respond.“I’ll keep that in mind,” I say, even though deep down, I know that’s easier said than done.
As the call ends, the noise of the clinic fades back in, but I’m still standing there, lost in the chaos of everything that’s coming.Santos.Dustin.The past we never really escaped.
I look down at my phone, my fingers hovering over the screen as I type a message to Dustin.
Halsey: I talked to Hayes.Santos is ...okay, as long as he sticks with the program and we keep him away from his father.We’ll figure this out.I’m going to Portland.
Dustin: Who is Hayes?Why are you going to Portland?Why didn’t you wake me up before you left?
Halsey: San is in Portland.I spoke to his surgeon—Hayes.Santos needs us and I’m almost sure they’re going to take him to Baker’s Creek for rehabilitation.
Dustin: You’ll work with him.
Halsey: Not the way you wanted me to, but I might get a job close to him.We have to be with him for moral support.
Dustin: When do you want to leave?
Halsey: I’m looking at the flights for tomorrow.Maybe at noon.I have to quit and probably pack some stuff ...it’s going to be a long day.
Dustin: How long does it take you to quit?
Halsey: Not long, I’m preparing my letter of resignation.I’ll hand it over and pack the few things I have in my desk.I should be at my apartment within an hour or so.
Dustin: Okay, the plane will be ready in two.Gavin will have people coming over tomorrow to pack your stuff and move it.What else do you need?
Halsey: What are you talking about?
Dustin: We have people to make things happen faster.I don’t want to waste your time or mine packing.Let’s be with our guy today.
Halsey: Okay then, I’ll be there soonish.
ChapterSeventeen
Santos
I keep rereadingthe text exchange between Hals and me.I’m in a loop just reading, wondering if my responses were stupid or if I could’ve said more.Beg her to stay, not to leave me again, not to ...I just don’t understand how it is possible that she doesn’t know if she can stay.I need her to stay with me, more than I can even put into words.
I need her to never leave me again.
How do I make her understand that since they took her away from me, I’ve been half-living?Barely surviving in a world without her.We had a plan—we were supposed to leave Blissful Meadows together.She’d study astronomy, Dusty would become a famous musician, and I’d make it big as a hockey player.
Only two out of three reached for their dreams, though it sounded last night like she has traveled.But did she?
What happened to her dreams of astronomy?What happened to her life?Why didn’t she reach out?
I tried searching for her more times than I can count.But she was a ghost.No social media, her parents refused to give me her number or location.It’s been years since I’ve seen her, years since I even let myself wonder what life would’ve been like with her still by my side.
I close my eyes, and the memories come crashing in, uninvited but unstoppable.
Blissful Meadows.Summer.The three of us—me, Dusty, and Halsey—just beginning to understand what it meant to belong to someone.
