Page 68 of Fake it 'Til Christmas

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Soren: There’s no breakup.

Winnifred: Fine, but I’m still not flying first class.

Soren: You want me to get you a charter—remember the footprints?

Winnifred: Carbon footprint, and fine, if this will help the environment, I’m in.Are you still using your ridiculous plane?

Soren: I haven’t flown.

Winnifred: Right, you won’t be back until it’s time for Friendsgiving.

Soren: And the pictures, don’t forget the pictures.

Winnifred: I can’t wait to see you ...unless you video call me again at four in the morning.

Soren: It won’t happen again.I will call when it’s daylight.

Winnifred: That’s why you’re my favorite fake-boyfriend.

Soren: Do you think we’re still faking it?

Winnifred: Ask me again after I land in Boston.

Soren: I’ll be texting and calling before then.

Winnifred: Yes, but we won’t discuss our little arrangement now, will we?

Soren: Fair, talk soon.

ChapterTwenty-Seven

Winnifred: How do you feel about matching flannel pajamas?

Soren: I feel like this is a trap.

Winnifred: It’s not.It’s a test.

Soren: So ...a trap dressed in buffalo plaid.

Winnifred: A test of character.Of seasonal commitment.Of whether you’re willing to match pajamas with your fake girlfriend while pretending not to be wildly attracted to her.

Soren: You’re forgetting the part where the pajamas are always too warm, and I look like an emotionally unavailable lumberjack.

Winnifred: So ...business as usual.

Soren: Touché.Fine.You pick the pajamas.I’ll bring the sarcasm and a coordinating pair of socks so you’re comfortable.

Winnifred: I knew you were in this for the aesthetic.

Soren: One day, you’ll stop pretending it is all about aesthetics.

Winnifred: Shhh.That’s my secret.When are you coming back?I bet you miss the unseasonal warm weather with those flurries we’ve had—all rolled into just one day.

Soren: Nothing like Colorado weather.

Winnifred: Yes, I don’t think I could be away for too long—I would miss my sun.

Soren: But if you were here, you wouldn’t miss me.

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