Page 88 of Let Me
“How did he find out?” he asks quietly. “If you didn’t send the video…” His eyes narrow on Rolland.
I cross my arms over my body, squeezing myself, shaking my head.
You took her.
That was the note Jack left.
Rolland’s fingers slide up my shirt, his skin against mine. I stop breathing, and Caden looks like he’s torn. Between letting his father kill me, and killing his father himself. He runs a hand over his face, blood streaking down his jaw, and closes his eyes, trying to breathe.
I don’t dare look to Benji.
Rolland’s hand reaches my neck, and then he runs his fingers through my hair.
“I did,” he says quietly.
It seems as if time has stopped.
No one moves.
No one breathes.
“I did,” he says again, tone even.
I finally look at him. His eyes lock on mine, a devious smile on his face.
“But you both were wrong, this whole time. He didn’t kill himself over it.” He shakes his head, enjoying my confusion. “You think a son of mine would take his own life?”
My chest feels tight.
“What the fuck are you saying?” Benji asks.
Caden hasn’t said a word.
“He was devastated over the video, when I sent it to him,” Rolland says again, fingers stroking my head. He brushes a lock of hair from my face, and I can’t look away from him. I no longer care there’s a gun two inches from my face. I need to hear this.
“No,” Rolland shakes his head and has the audacity to look aggrieved. “He found out about you and me, Riley,” he continues. “He found out aboutus.”
“No,” I say, the word barely audible, even between us, as I realize what it is he’s saying. “No.” I shake my head, shaking off his fingers. “No. He can’t have. You wouldn’t have—” I always hoped he didn’t know. Always hoped he thought I slept with some random stranger. That in his last moments, he didn’t die hating his own father.
“Oh, Riley. I would have done anything to keep you underneath me. And he fought me, when I came up to his room after I sent it. He fought me. He felt sorry for you. I can understand that.”
You took her.
I always thought it was to a man he didn’t know. A last plea against a stranger.
“That note…” I’m fumbling for words. I’m fumbling tothink. I feel as if I might collapse. I feel as if I might take that gun and shove it down Rolland’s throat myself.
“That note was from me.” Rolland sighs, and I stare down at my lap, mouth hanging open. He keeps talking and I try to focus on his words, try not to fall apart. “I showed him the video that night, after I came home and sent Matthew out.” Rolland laughs, and it makes my hair stand on end. “I wrote the note, to keep you quiet, darling. To give you that guilt. To flesh out the scene.”
“What are you saying?” I manage to ask, feeling my blood turn to ice in my veins from terror.
“Jack Virani didn’t commit suicide, darling. He lunged for me, when I came up to his room afterward. I wanted him to get out of his misery. Stop crying over you. To leave you alone, because you weremine.He went forme.Grabbed the gun he knows I always have, here.” He pats his chest, where he had pulled the gun from moments ago. He sighs. “We struggled. But in the end, it was me or him. And he was always weak. It was too easy to stage a suicide. You saw it yourself.”
I stop breathing.
I did see.
Caden did, too.
