Page 52 of The Cruelest Chaos
I take a deep breath. “Angel, you know he would never force you to—”
She snaps her head up, glares at me. “Are you married to him? Or am I?”
I straighten, brow furrowed. “I mean, I think that’s a rhetorical question, but please do explain what the fuck you mean.”
She shifts from one foot to the other but holds my gaze. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say she’s nervous. But I know Lucifer, and I know he loves Sid more than himself. He might be losing his mind a little right now, but he wouldn’t ever make her keep a child, even if it was his...
“Wait,” I say when Sid doesn’t speak, “do you think...it isn’t his?” Oh fuck.
“Fuck you.” She makes to step around me.
Well, then. Nice talking to you, too, Sis.
But no. I can’t just let her go like that. At the last second, I reach out and curl my fingers around her forearm, jerking her to a halt.
She whips around, her mouth pressed into a thin line. “What the fuck do you want?” she hisses, clenching her jaw.
I’m not going to take her. Ican’ttake her. But there’s a reason she hasn’t told Lucifer, and I need to know what it is. I don’t think she’s lying. I don’t think he would ever really hurt her. Not any more than they always hurt each other.
But still…my mind races as I try to recall every interaction I’ve had with each of them lately. I’ve been thinking something was off with Sid, but after getting rid of Pammie, I thought she’d be okay. Before that, though…I was wondering if she should talk to someone, anyone, about what went down at Sacrificium. But then again, who the fuck is there to talk to? She can’t exactly see a therapist with that shit. And Ezra knows that, too, which is why he’s drowning all of his fucking sorrows in a bottle. Cain is burying his in every girl he can get his hands on. Every fight he can beat someone bloody in.
But still. They were born into this. They’ve had nearly twenty-four years to deal with it. Sid had blocked it out, escaped for a while. Been under Jeremiah’s protection. And now, now that she escaped him, she looks even thinner than she did when her and Luce got married.
Lucifer hasn’t mentioned it at all to me. He either hasn’t noticed or doesn’t care. I would bet money it isn’t the latter, but his eyes don’t have the shadows hers do. They’re not bloodshot, and he’s not withdrawn like she is.
She’s back to being the saddest girl I’ve ever seen in my life.
“Talk to me, Angel,” I manage to say when she looks like she might backhand me.
“Please. I’m sorry that I can’t take you to…” I glance at her stomach, “to deal with that, but please talk to me. Why won’t you tell Luce? I’m sure he would understand.”
She bites out a laugh, tries to pull her wrist from my grip. But if I let her go, she’ll walk right out and I won’t be able to stop her, so I just curl my fingers tighter around her.
“No,Bro, he wouldn’t.”
“Does he know you’re pregnant?”
She chews her bottom lip and sighs, her arm going limp in my grip. “Pretty much.”
“Pretty much?I’mpretty fucking surethat’s a yes or no question.”
“He knows, but we haven’t discussed it.”
“Okay, Angel, this shit isn’t making any sense—”
“I don’t want to talk about it with him. But he knows me well enough to know.”
Whatever.“And is he…excited?”
She nods. “Yeah. That’s the problem. He’s…he’s fucking over the moon.”
When did he find out?I want to ask.Was it before or after he was getting a hardon from a random chick at Liber?I push those thoughts aside. They’ll only upset her more.
“Okay.” I try to understand this from her point of view. “I can understand you don’t want to upset him, but if you get an abortion behind his back, don’t you think that’s going to be…worse?”
“No fucking shit,” she says through narrowed eyes.
I run my hand over my face, and then before I can get a fucking hold of myself, I back her up against the fridge, my hands on her shoulders.
