Page 273 of Ominous: Part 1
There’s a crack.A clatter. Something shatters.
A thud.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Dominic’s words, meant to placate.
Eli says nothing.
I’m on my side, curled into a ball, no one is touching me, my fingers are over my face, and I don’t want to move them. I’m trembling, my heart is beating way too fast. So fast, I think I’m going to throw up. The taste of marijuana has my stomach convulsing. I’m rocking back and forth, and I imagine jumping over the railing of the balcony.
I’m going to jump.
If I get off of this bed,I will jump.
Another thud.
Dom’s words again. “I…You were right fucking there!”
I feel something wet on my fingers. Blood?
No, no. It’s worse.
It’s tears. Salty and hot and hopeless.
I press my fingers harder against my eyes, wanting the pressure to keep me grounded. I don’t know how much time passes. The only sound seems to be my own lungs working, too hard, too fast alongside my heart. The streaky tears along my cheeks burn, matching the fire of humiliation and panic and dread in my stomach. I want to be alone.
I hope they left.
I hope they’re gone.
I hope I can climb over the balcony by myself when I can stop shaking.
After what feels like an eternity, I hear a voice.
“Eden.”
I freeze.
They didn’t leave.
I wish I could wake up in my own bed, my own house, because when I move my fingers from my face, I’ll have to say something. I’ll have to explain something, won’t I? I can’t. I don’t want to. My thoughts feel like they could eat me alive, if my heart doesn’t give out first.
I barely remember that word is my name.
“Eden.” Again, from his lips.
Despite my quiet panic, it’s like a compulsion, giving in to his unspoken request.
Open your eyes. Let me in.
He has too much power over me. I can’t do anything about it.
I move my fingers.
I open my eyes.
They feel so heavy, and the room is spinning. The marijuana hasn’t slowed my pulse and it’s so fierce against my ribcage, I think it could crack my bones.
Eli is kneeling on the bed, leaning in toward me. His face is full of concern, a wrinkle in his brow, his bottom lip between his teeth. It’s almost as if, when he saw my eyes, he also saw how bad this is. There’re words on the tip of his tongue, but he doesn’t get them out immediately.
