Page 98 of Puck You
Bryce gave me a slow clap, his lips twisting into a sardonic smile.“I’m glad you finally figured out that the world doesn’t revolve around you.”
A crushing weight pressed down on my chest.The people in my life deserved more from me: Bryce, Grace, my teammates—Kate.
“When you’re with Grace, you’re like the old Sebastian, the one who was fun to be around and didn’t blame everyone else for his problems.”
He was right.I’d let my life be defined by hockey, and when that was taken from me, I’d lost myself.But Grace had helped merealize that I was someone outside of the rink.She was the best thing about me, and last night, in a moment of selfish rage, I’d thrown it all away.
“I’m going to make things right.”
“It’s not going to be easy, not after what you said to her.Not after—” He stopped himself short.
“Not after what?”
A telling silence hung in the air between us.I was missing something.
“Why isn’t she here, Bryce?”
His lips pressed together in a slight grimace before he said, “Her dad had a heart attack.She was rushing off to the hospital to see him when you ...”
When I accosted her.Shame wrapped itself around my body in a smothering embrace.
“Is he okay?”
Bryce gave a solemn nod, though it did little to ease my conscience.I’d ruinedeverythingover a split-second feeling of betrayal that wasn’t even real.I had to make things right, even if hell was more likely to freeze over than Grace forgiving me.
“She needs time at home to heal with her family.Give her that.”
“And in the meantime?”I asked, feeling at a complete loss for how to move forward.
“Figure out what the hell you’re going to do to make things right.”
Chapter 23
Sebastian
Every instinct was screaming at me to pick up the phone and call Grace.It felt like the longer we went without speaking, the less likely she was to forgive me.But her dad was in the hospital, and Bryce was right.She needed time at home to heal with her family.That was what was most important.Not my own anguish or the sense of growing panic I felt at the thought of losing her.
I couldn’t sit still or wait around, so after my parents left, I took a long shower to wash off the remnants of my hangover and immediately set off for DuLane.Once a place of refuge for me, the training center now carried with it the shame of my greatest mistakes.I walked the deserted corridors, drowning in sorrow at the lost sense of comfort I’d come to expect within these towering walls.When Coach Dawson’s office finally came into view, my misery doubled.
The surly man was hunched over a mound of paperwork, his glasses perched at the very tip of his nose.They looked one sneeze away from sliding right off his face.The room was in its usual state—cluttered with half-open boxes of equipment andempty bottles of Diet Coke, the whiteboard behind his desk hidden beneath a drawing of a three-on-two jailbreak drill.I hovered in the doorway hesitantly, working up the courage to step forward.
“Are you waiting for me to invite you in?”
Straightening my shoulders, I took a deep breath and stepped inside.Coach motioned for me to take the chair in front of his desk.For a long time, he said nothing, so I sat across from him and watched him work.The first few minutes of silence were the most awkward.Several times my mouth dropped open, an apology poised at the tip of my tongue, but the words never came.Something told me that this discussion needed to be on his time, and I was right.Eventually, he set down his pencil and leaned back into his chair.When I saw the look in his eyes, my stomach sank.
“I’ve coached for over twenty years now, and in all that time, I’ve never had a more talented player on my ice.You’ve got something special, Sebastian, no one can deny that,” he said, and I knew what three-letter word came next.“But if you can’t see past your own two skates, you’ll never make it in the pros.It’s more than provingyourselfon that ice.You’ve already done that.Now you have to prove that you’re worthy of this team.”
“Understood, sir,” I said, my voice thick.“I’m sorry for letting everyone down.”
“I hope so.Just to make sure, I’m going to give you the week off so you can think about how you might serve this team better when you return.”
That was a nice way of saying he was suspending me for seven days, not just one game.“You should make Bryce the captain for the remainder of the year.He’s earned it,” I said.
Coach nodded in agreement.“That would be easy, wouldn’t it?But that’s not how life works.I want to seeyouearn the title you were given.This team depends on your leadership, and I won’t let you back down now that things have gotten tough.”
“I’m not the same guy I was when you made me captain, and I don’t think I ever will be,” I admitted.
“You don’t need to be that guy; you just need to be better than the guy you were last night.”
