Page 89 of Awestruck at Dusk
To be there for me.
He was finally putting his assistant to work. She would help him sort his schedule out, clearing it out for important things like this weekend.
The Sjöbergs invited us to spend Midsummer in Sagaponack. Nathan and I planned to leave today at around 4:00 p.m. and return on Sunday late in the afternoon. My father agreed for me to go because Nathan convinced him. My security detail would take turns to rest at an inn close to the cottage.
I know what you’re thinking: What about William?
When Lily called to invite us, I immediately refused. There was no way I would spend the weekend at William’s house. Especially when I knew Zara would be attending too. And I didn’t even have to ask Nathan to know that he wouldn’t want to go either.
Seeing William and Zara together wasn’t something I wanted to try anytime soon. She moved to New York for good three days ago, and she would be staying in William’s empty apartment, of course, until she found an apartment for herself. I’m sure she wasn’t in a hurry to get that done.
Zara hadn’t asked to stay with me, and Nathan was too busy to remember to offer her my place. Lily told me William was filming in South Africa. Andthat’sthe reason why I agreed to go to the Hamptons.
William wasn’t going to be there.
Dating Nathan meant that I would have to learn to coexist with Zara. She had come to my apartment to say hi when she arrived, but we hadn’t hung out. I was too occupied with the final project that I handed in today, and Nathan arrived from D.C. early this morning, so he hadn’t seen her.
But we would both see her today once we arrived in Sagaponack and would hang out with her the entire weekend. There was no way to avoid that, and I wasn’t one bit excited about it. She left early in the morning with Lily and Joel. Eric and Tobias arrived yesterday, and I didn’t know if Sivert and Nathalie, their parents, would be there or not since things had been tricky after the divorce. Lily told me they weren’t getting along so well.
If one of them did show up, that meant theonlyavailable room for Zara would be William’s. And the thought of her sleeping on his bed was fucking annoying. But who are we kidding? She would most definitely lay her pretty head to sleep on William’s pillows either way.
I forced myself to make my peace with that thought as I closed the small suitcase I was taking for the weekend when Nathan called me.
“Hey, you! I’m heading over to pick you up in about five minutes. Are you ready?”
“I’m—not. That’s why I’m calling. I’m not done yet, but I can arrive tomorrow at noon,” Nathan said, his tone low and seemingly stressed.
“It’s okay. I can wait for you if you want, and we’ll leave tomorrow. Together.”
“No, no, no. Everyone’s already there. You’re done with school—you should go. I’ll see you there tomorrow. I promise.”
Nathan had been keeping to his promises lately. I wasn’t too worried about him showing up or not, so I agreed. I was looking forward to hanging out with Lily, and I had a pending chat with Tobias. We hadn’t been able to talk after what happened on my birthday with Jordan and Cecile. I wanted to clear the air once and for all.
I wanted my friend back.
“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow then,” I told him. “I’ll miss you today.”
“I’ll miss you too. I can’t wait to see you. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“Hey, Billie!” Eric said, walking up to me. We hugged each other, and then he peeked inside the car. “Where’s Nate?”
“He’ll be arriving tomorrow.”
“Aww! Why?” Lily shouted from afar, darting our way.
Eric took my small suitcase out of David’s hands and told him he would bring it inside for me.
Setting foot in this place again was nerve-wracking for a million reasons, starting with the painful fact that Caleb was here with me the last time I came. I missed his face, his eyes, his voice.
Him.
And William didn’t have to be here for me to be reminded of him anywhere I fixed my sight on either. Like the freaking pool, for example. I wished it would’ve been drained, but no, there it was, looking at me funny like,hey, hey, we meet again. Remember me?
I ignored the pool and kept walking.
“Hey!” I hugged Lily. “Nathan couldn’t get out of the office today. But he promised to be here tomorrow by noon.”
