Page 49 of A Merry Little Christmas
His eyes slid away from mine.
Then he suddenly reached for the envelope on the sofa, and that’s when I caught a glimpse of the photograph lying beneath it. With a punch of shock, I recognised the figure in it and made a move to snatch it up, but Caleb got there first. Folding the envelope and the photograph together, he marched over to the open fire and threw them both onto the embers.
‘What are youdoing?’ I gasped and ran over, wanting to retrieve the photo. But it had already caught fire, the face burning away to nothing.
‘Why didn’t you want me to see that photo?’ I demanded, feeling utterly bewildered.
‘Because I care about you.’
‘What?’ I gave a scornful laugh. ‘You care about me but you want to cool things between us?’
‘Yes. It’s for the best,’ he said calmly, although I could see a muscle working in his jaw.
‘Well, fine. If you’re not going to tell me what the hell is going on here, then we’ll call it a day and I’ll leave you to your oh-so-cosy relationship with Amanda.’ Tears were blinding me now as I headed for the door. ‘Even if you twoaren’tan item yet, I’m sure you soon will be. Because you clearly trust Amanda far more than you trustme.’
‘It’s not like that,’ he insisted. ‘There’s nothing going on.’
‘No?’ I turned at the door. ‘Well, pardon me if I don’t believe you. You’ve been cooler than... than... a polar bear’stoenailstowards me recently so it really won’t wash to say that everything’s fine.’
‘Everything’snotfine, Katja.’ He followed me into the hall. ‘But I can’t go into the details.’
‘Of course you can’t.’ I wrenched open the front door. ‘Why not call Amanda? She’s clearly the one you’d rather confide in these days.’
I stormed away to the car and Caleb didn’t even try to stop me.
Glancing back as I slid into the driver’s seat, I saw that he’d already vanished inside and the front door was closed. As if he couldn’t wait for me to be gone.
All the way home, two questions were plaguing me.
Who had sent a photograph of me getting into my car outside the supermarket to Caleb?
And why had he felt it necessary to burn it?
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
So that was it, then. We were over.
He’d said he wanted to ‘cool things’ because it was ‘for the best’, but that could mean lots of different scenarios – including the popularI’m too chicken to tell you it’s over so I’ll just lead you on for a while in hope before finally dumping you!
Richard had been a master at that.
He’d withdrawn his love and loyalty so gradually that for the longest time, I hadn’t even realised it was happening. It was only after the Emily bomb exploded around me that I’d looked back over the final few months of our relationship and I’d seen how our previously close bond had been slowly unravelling.
The ridiculous thing was that deep down I’d actuallyknownthat Caleb had been leading up to this decision. But I’d been stupidly determined to look on the bright side. I’d actually managed to convince myself that I was only being paranoid when I’d felt he was distancing himself from me.
I’d blamed work.
But it turned out I hadn’t been imagining it at all.
I was so stunned, I felt numb on the drive home. I knew the feelings of heartbreak and loss would come, but for now I was locked in a weird kind of daze as my brain tried to process it all.
How would I cope with not seeing him?
My post-Caleb life was going to look so very different. It hardly seemed real...
Passing a church clock, I saw the time and reality intruded into my thoughts. I was due at work in an hour. Was it worth going home first? Probably not. I would go straight to the café.
I was feeling so shaken by Caleb’s bald announcement that we should cool things and I really needed to see a friendly face. I smiled sadly to myself. Ellie would understand. She would behorrified on my behalf. At times like these, you really needed your true friends.
