Page 44 of The Goddess is Awakened
“God deaths are similar and different to mortal deaths. Our essence goes to the Aether, but unlike mortals, we don’t get reborn in a new vessel with no memories of our previous lives. In theory, another living vessel will be created that can contain us and our essence will rejoin it.
“Inanna and Osiris came back pretty soon and with the help of their families, got their memories back, and adjusted to dying and coming back. Some of them have been in the Aether for a very long time. They’ll probably be mad as hatters and have serious issues adjusting if the Fates choose to give them vessels again.”
“And you were going to risk doing that to me to test your stupid theory? I’m not like your other god friends. I’ve only been alive eighteen years and there’s still shit to do on my bucket list.”
“Please don’t hit me again. Your dad brags that you’re a beast on the dodgeball field and it hurts. I was almost positive my scythe wasn’t going to kill you because I’m pretty sure I’ve figured out your magic. And I was right. It’s pretty fucking amazing, too.”
“I’m still mad you thought I was going to kill people and thenyouwere the one that tried to kill me.”
“Seriously? I had to look at all scenarios when I got here and I technically didn’t know you. My scythe was the only way to confirm what your magic really is and I doubt you would have held it if you knew it could kill you. You didn’t even know youcoulddie.”
Azren and I were inches apart. I was tall, but I wasn’t seven feet tall like most gods, so they towered above me. I couldn’t believe they had turned this around and were acting like I should be grateful they figured out my magic. There was a ton of shit I still wanted to do.
“You still should have given me that choice!” I yelled.
Before I even knew what was happening, Azren was kissing me. What was even happening right now? I was mad, but I was kissing them back. This was definitely a mad kiss, and I ended it by biting them. They just growled and bit me right back before pulling away.
“Ineverwould have handed you that scythe if I wasn’t sure. You’re the most fascinating, beautiful thing I’ve found in this realm for a very long time. Do you get it now?”
Oh. Oh! The feeling was pretty much mutual, aside from the shit I was mad about. I was guessing if Azren had been wanting to kiss me, this wouldn’t have been some scholar so wrapped up in a theory, they were willing to kill me to test it because they knew eventually, I might come back. Plus, my dads and my mom would lose their shit and Loki had already killed one god out of revenge.
“I think I do.”
“Come here so I can explain your magic and what it means,” Azren said.
They led me over to a loveseat that was also covered in books. Azren just waved their hand, and the books disappeared. We sat on the loveseat and they wrapped their arm around me. I snuggled into their chest. I was right the first time I saw Azren up on stage. They smelled fantastic. Their cologne was a mix of gourmand resins and woods with a hint of vanilla.
“The infirmary has been able to remove it every time you’ve turned the Krauss girl’s hair to snakes. I believe you when you say you can do certain magic around your dad, Loki, and Lilith, but not when you try to practice without them. When you held my scythe, you went to the veil. It’s where spirits go when they are not on this plane.
“Certain witches like Beatrix Halliwell are gifted in spirit magic and have greater control over ghosts, but the only people who can traverse the veil are my reapers and me. And apparently, you, sometimes. And don’t say you’re defective. I don’t like it.”
“What does it mean?”
“It means you’re pretty fucking powerful. I’m certain when you gave Kaylee snakes for hair, the infirmary was able to remove it because you weren’t mimicking a witch hex with god powers. You were actuallydoingwitchcraft. I’m pretty sure your superpower is that you can mimic whatever magical thing you’re near, gods included. It’s how you did Chaos magic when you weren’t supposed to, but can also do trickster stuff, and Lilith can teach you things.”
“So, my magic only works if I’m standing next to someone? Lame.”
Azren squeezed me and sighed.
“One of these days, I’m going to take you over my knee until you realize how fucking special you are. I’m pretty sure there’s a way to hold on to it until you need it, but it might be a loophole from the Fates. Giving a god the ability to mimic the power of whomever they are near is dangerous in the wrong hands. Giving you the ability to hold on to it would make the other gods nervous. I can’t be in multiple places at once to put them in time out if they decide to leave their fancy realms to do something about it.”
My hand went to my necklace. The whole reason Lilith made it for me was in case the other gods reacted badly just because I’d been born. They all ignored me. I met Odin once when my parents took us on vacation. He was living in France writing books instead of living in Asgard. Odin hadn’t sired any new kids, but he thought babies were a wonderful thing and spoiled all of us when we visited. I didn’t know of anyone else who was staying on this realm.
I was getting close to taking it off, but maybe I shouldn’t. Azren closed their hand over mine.
“I want to kiss you again, but that can’t happen outside this office. It’s against the rules and I don’t think being a god is going to spare me from getting fired if they catch us. If you’re thinking you should keep this necklace on indefinitely, don’t. The other gods don’t pay attention to this realm. The gods who know you will be happy for you. I know Odin. He might have made some mistakes with Loki and his kids, but he learned his lesson. He’s going to find you fascinating, not a threat. When you’re comfortable, let everyone see the real you. We’ll work on your magic now that I know what I’m dealing with.”
I didn’t expect that when I figured out my magic, it was going to bethat.It did put a target on my back if I abused it, which I wasn’t planning to do.
Still, all my hangups about actually taking this necklace off just got worse.
george
Azren was something. West took his shirt off to get me a birthday cake. Church touched me a lot and used his vampire mojo to soothe me. Oscar drew me pictures and Ren picked me flowers and stole shit. They didn’t even know what was bothering me. Azren knew, and they weren’t pressing me. Apparently, Azren’s love language was food and massages.
They conjured food from their realm and alternated between feeding me and rubbing my back. The food from Azren’s realm was amazing, and they gave fantastic massages. They finally kissed me on the top of the head and told me I probably needed twin time. Which was definitely true.
Church was waiting in the common room when I got back. He jumped to attention when he saw me.
