Page 87 of Desolation
"I'll leave you two alone in a moment. Just gotta check on the patient," the nurse says.
"Of course, Kit-Kat," Serenity says sweetly, making me choke on a scoff. The nurse levels Serenity with an admonishing glare. "Sorry!Katrina."
Katrina walks over to me with a light in her hand. I roll my eyes just before she checks for signs of concussion for the hundredth time. Her hair falls into my face, making me spit the strands from my mouth.
"Oh, hush," she chastises me, flicking her hair behind her shoulder. "It'll be over in a moment." She watches my eyes intently for a brief moment before clicking the light off with a sigh. "Serenity, there is nothing wrong with his eyes. No sign of concussion. Noextra black in his eyesas you stated. I'm discharging him."
"Okay, fine. Thank you for checking anyways. Dinner soon?" They talk quietly amongst themselves, low enough that I can't hear, before Serenity pulls away and says aloud, "Can I have a moment alone with boy wonder?"
Katrina shrugs, making her way out of the hospital room. "He's not my patient anymore. You can take him when you're done."
Serenity drops theKit-Katloving personality and in its place stands the face of an ice queen.
Why the fuck did I challenge her? What inside of me thinks I could take her?
She lowers herself to my eye-level and points a finger into my chest. "Listen to me very closely. I have my fucking eye on you. I might not know the extent of your powers but I sense something dark in you. I won't allow it to ruin everything Gaia has worked for. What Lana is working for."
I can't even argue as I feel that darkness swirling inside me at her statement. It flares at the mention of Gaia, wanting me to defile the Goddess's name and spit on the floor at her mention. I grimace and bite down on my tongue hard enough to draw blood.
Serenity mistakes this for my submission. "That's right, Ash. You better be nervous. I'm the only person allowed to give Anal a hard time. You are supposed to be her mate! Start fucking acting like it."
There's nothing I can say to make this better. There's nothing I cando.I want to tuck my tail between my legs and go home. Shoving the barely-there hospital sheet off of me, I sit up, noticing the ugly gown that bares my ass to the world. I glance around for my leathers and come up short.
"They were destroyed by Lana's magic," Serenity says. "How did that happen when they’re supposed to be magic resistant? Don't ask me. And yes, you were carried to the hospital, bare-ass." She lays a hand on my forearm. "I'm taking you back to the house because you have a lot of deep shit to deal with. But, if you hurt anyone else, Ash?" She shakes her head, trailing off. "You've done enough damage for today."
Pain lances my chest at the memory of Zedd, hurt and unconscious because of me, and the dejected look in Lana's eyes when I kept throwing attack after attack at her, unrelenting and uncaring.
I don't deserve to go back to them.
Tears brim in my eyes, the first time my own sorrow manages to breach the hatred brimming. Whatever the fuck this thing is, has even kept me from mourning Beth since that night at the inn. Why am I now able to feel it?
"Nut up," Serenity says, seeing the tears in my eyes, misunderstanding my reaction once more. "Handle the shit you’ve caused."
She transports me directly into our bedroom where Lana is sprawled out alone in the bed. Longing overcomes me, urging me to hold her in my arms.
Just before she vanishes, Serenity quietly whispers her parting words to me. "You owe it to yourself and to her to fix this. Mate bonds are special. Don't throw away this opportunity to be with yours."
Alone in the bedroom, I drag my hands over my face and hold in a groan, not yet ready to alert Lana to my presence.
I don't want to throw this away. She's my entire fucking world.
I thank Gaia that I feel more like myself right now than I have in the past forty-eight hours and decide that now is the best time to explain myself.
Walking over to my clothes drawer, I ditch the hospital gown on the chaise and throw on a pair of black boxer briefs before going to stand by the bed. I stare at her prone form, her back rising with her every breath, her copper hair spread around her, bright against the white comforter. Her face looks so soft and peaceful. I almost walk away, knowing how it will fall in disappointment at the sight of me.
Who knows if she even wants to fix this? I have no idea what the hell is going on with me or how to stop it.
I'm broken.
If I tell her that, she'll think it's a cop-out excuse for my behavior and kick me out, most likely.
Steeling my nerves, I ease my way onto the bed, gently pulling her against me and adjusting her until her head lies against my shoulder. She stirs in her sleep and mutters my name before falling quiet again.
She'd run the other way if she was awake right now.
Enjoying what could be the last time I hold my mate in my arms, I burrow my nose in her hair, inhaling her jasmine scent. The moment brings me back to when I sneezed on her face only a few days ago. Life was so simple then, so carefree. How did everything change so quickly?
Sighing, I kiss the top of her head. "I love you."
