Page 60 of The Bound Mage
“Stay back,” she groaned. “I can’t control it.”
There had been blood. She’d hurt Loren. Gods, had she killed anyone? Eilwen had been standing right there. If she’d hurt Selan?—
“You have to stay calm, Araya.” Thorne’s hand touched her forehead, the cool rush of healing magic racing across her skin. “The more upset you get, the worse it will be.”
“I told you to stay out,” Araya snarled. Her power flared violently, rising to meet his touch with a burning snap. Her heartbeat roared in her ears, her skin prickling with heat as the magic tried to defend her from a threat that wasn’t there.
Thorne swore under his breath, yanking his hand back. But he didn’t step back.
“You shouldn’t be here,” she gasped again. She didn’t want to hurt Thorne. She didn’t want to hurtanyone. But she had. “Did I kill anyone?”
“No.” Thorne’s face twisted, but he didn’t lie, even though he could. “There were a few burns, and some people were injured in the crush—but you didn’t kill anyone.”
She didn’t need Thorne to tell her she had Loren to thank for that. He’d saved all those people—saved her. But now…the bond twisted in her chest, his fury raging through it.
“You manifested, Araya,” Thorne said, his voice soothing. “Your power is still trying to protect you, but it doesn’t need to anymore. I promise, you’re safe. You can let it go.”
Araya jerked out of his reach, clenching her teeth so hard her jaw ached. She wanted to believe him—but all she could smell was smoke, and beneath it, the faintest trace of rain-washed granite.
“Where is he?”
Thorne hesitated, his silence saying more than any answer he could have given. “He hasn’t left Lumaria.”
“He’s so angry.” Araya shuddered. He wasn’t here. He’d left her—again. “He’s going to kill someone.”
“You’re going to killyourself,” Thorne said grimly. “Let me help you, Araya. Please?—”
She tried to shake her head, but the room spun around her, black spots dancing at the edges of her vision. Thorne said something else, but she couldn’t hear him over the roaring in her ears. She couldn’t lose consciousness. She needed to hold on?—
The next timeshe opened her eyes the bond was quiet in her chest—content.
Loren held her hand, his fingers tangled with hers. Power rushed into her through that connection, as bright and warm as his shadows were cool. He was offering her his strength, just as she had done for him. Worse, his thumb brushed gently across the back of her hand, over and over again, steady and soothing.
“Don’t touch me.” Araya yanked her hand away, struggling to sit up despite the warning lurch of her stomach.
“Easy,” Loren said. He moved without hesitation, slipping an arm around her shoulders to help her lean over a basin he must have had ready.
Her whole frame shook as she retched, bringing up nothing but bile. But Loren just gathered her hair back from her face, tracing soothing circles across her back with his other hand.
“You’re—”
“Burned out,” Araya rasped, dragging the back of her hand across her mouth. “I know what it feels like.”
Loren winced. “Of course you do,” he said. “I just?—”
“How long did you know what he was doing?”
Loren flinched like she’d struck him, his guilt written across his face. “I was trying to protect you?—”
“From what?” Her voice cracked. “The consequences of my actions? The truth? Don’t pretend this is the first thing you’ve hidden from me. All you’ve ever done is keep secrets from me.”
“I didn’t want to trap you,” Loren argued, his hands flexing uselessly at his side. “You’ve already had so many choices taken way from you?—”
“But youdid. Or are you going to deny you kept it from me because you were afraid of what I’d choose?” Araya shook her head, not waiting for him to give an answer he couldn’t speak. “Tell me—how many fae has he killed just because they look like me?”
Loren stared at her without answering. Dark circles shadowed his eyes, and even the living darkness that always accompanied him was strangely subdued, but she hardened her heart, refusing to be moved by it. She should have refused to feel sympathy for him from the first second she saw him in that cell. It would have been easier—for both of them.
“You let them die because you were afraid to lose me,” Araya said, her voice dropping to a whisper. “And now I’m the one who has to live with that.”
