Page 107 of The Life We Almost Had

She always looks beautiful.

‘Happy first anniversary, husband.’ She kissed me softly, her lips sticky with gloss. ‘This is for you.’ She held out a small present and I took it, awkwardly pushing the flowers and chocolates into her arms. We moved onto the sofa, where she opened her card and exclaimed how gorgeous the flowers were while I tussled with the red ribbon wrapped around the turquoise gift box. Inside nestled a pair of cufflinks. I looked questioningly at her.

‘The first anniversary is “paper” so I bought you some paper aeroplane cufflinks so you never forget your dream to travel.’

‘Anna!’ I felt overcome with emotion. A bit of a dick for not researching anniversary rules, I should have known there would be some. I lifted the cufflinks from the box.

‘They’re great.’

‘They’re useless without this.’ She slid out another box from under the sofa and placed it on my knee. I tore off the wrapping paper. A shirt.

‘Strictly speaking, that’s cotton for next year but I know you don’t have the right shirts for wearing cufflinks, so…’

I kissed her hard, wanting my mouth to convey what my gifts hadn’t.That every single one of the 365 days of our marriage I had felt like a lucky bastard.

Now she takes my hand. ‘Oliver, I absolutely have to be with Adam on our anniversary.’

And despite everything, I still feel like a lucky bastard.

Chapter Sixty-Eight

Anna

While I’m waiting for Oliver to decide whether he’ll let me say goodbye to Adam, it hits me.

‘It was real!’ A whoosh of excitement rockets from the tips of my toes to my scalp. ‘It was real!’ I am fizzing with relief that I have remembered the one thing that had been gnawing at me. The single thing that will convince Oliver I had been speaking the truth. ‘Oh my God!’ I clutch his arm, I’m shaky but am grinning so wide I can feel the stretch of my cheeks. ‘It happened just as I said. All of it. I can prove it.’ I rush off to my room. Adam’s case is ready to leave in the corner where I left it. I unzip it and begin to dump his clothes on the floor. At the bottom of the case is a box. ‘You Are…’ is painted on the outside. I tip out the contents; red, yellow, orange pieces of paper float to the floor.

Gorgeous, says one.

Soul mate, another.

Kind.

Coming around to loving Eighties music.

A far better cook than me.

My best friend.

Emotions burn behind my eyes. This must be Adam’s anniversary gift to me. But I can’t allow myself to become distracted by the sentiment. It isn’t what I’m looking for.

Think! Where would he hide something from me?

I stick my hand inside his left trainer, empty. His right. And there it is, shoved in the toe. Triumphantly I rush back to Oliver.

‘Look!’ I wave the purple velvet pouch in my hand.

‘What’s that?’

‘That,’ I say as I tip out the delicate silver chain with the pram charm onto his hand, ‘is the bracelet Adam gave me after I’d given birth to Harry. Remember? Itoldyou about it when you brought me back. Youwroteit down. Adam had said that he had bought it the morning after I had told him I was pregnant. That was the morning of the yacht accident. He told me that he bought it with the intention of giving it to me the day I gave birth. Hedidsave it until the day I gave birth.’

Oliver turns the bracelet over in his hand but he doesn’t speak.

‘If I’m not really in Adam’s consciousness, but fabricating the whole thing with my mind, how could I have known to include this bracelet in my imagination? I didn’t know it really existed until today.’

‘It could be something you’ve brought here from the UK.’

‘It isn’t. The charm is handmade by the little shop by the cove near our hotel. You can check.’

---