Page 173 of Becoming Us
His lips pulled into a slow, thoughtful smile. “Maybe. Depends on where the right opportunities are.”
“You wouldn’t want to go back to Miami?”
He shook his head. “I’ve never been crazy about Florida. I’d miss my mom, but I’d still visit. Maybe have her fly out to see me,” he added. “Why’d you ask?”
“I just wanted to know where I’d have to follow you to.”
He gave me a look, like I was being ridiculous. “You wouldn’t have to follow me. We’ll build our lives together—find a way to make it work for both of us.”
Like it was the simplest thing in the world. Like this was a given now.
My chest tightened. I reached up, tracing the line of his jaw with my fingertips, watching as his expression softened. “Sounds like a plan.”
His lips found mine, warm and gentle.
“How about kids? Do you want them?” I brushed my mouth against his.
He chuckled, still close. “Yeah. I’ve always wanted to. You?”
I hesitated. “It scares me. Kids are easy to fuck up. And I’m well known for doing the fucking up.”
“But do youwantthem?”
I pictured the house. Years from now, filled with our things—Atty and I running around a routine. The cat lounging on the couch and the dog barking at our feet as we rushed to get the kids ready for school. It was a nice picture. One that made my chest swell with hope.
“I want them,” I admitted quietly.
He smiled, and the room felt a little brighter. “Okay. Anything else?”
“How about marriage? The whole wedding thing. Yay or nay?”
I watched, transfixed, as a flush crept into his face—even the tips of his ears.
He grinned, sheepish. “I think it’s nice. So yeah, I guess I’m for it. Just…probably not right now.”
I chuckled. “Don’t worry, I’m not asking you to marry me tonight. When we get there, though, I’m going to make it a whole thing. Like a performance. You deserve a performance.”
He gave a quiet laugh, clearly pleased. It was obvious in the flush still warming his cheeks, in the way he pressed his lips together to hide his smile.
If someone had told me months ago that the same man who once looked at me with so much anger would now be gazing at me like this—soft and hopeful—I would’ve laughed in their face.
“I’m not going to let you down again,” I whispered.
Our eyes met, and his smile fell a little. He didn’t argue, just nodded after a moment.
“I know you don’t want me to keep saying it, so I’ll make this the last time, okay?”
Another quiet nod.
“I’m sorry for all I put you through. Every little thing that made you feel like you weren’t important to me—or that your feelings weren’t. I think about it all the time. How much I regretthose mistakes. You take up most of my big five, Atty, and I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you.”
And I would. Every fucking day.
His thumb caressed my cheek, his eyes never leaving mine. “You’re going to be an amazing dad.”
I choked out a laugh. “What?”
“I know you’re scared you’ll turn out like her. Or even your dad. That you’ll make a kid feel like you did—like you made me feel too. But you’re not like that.”
