Page 101 of Replay
All right, so maybe there could have been deeper clarity over that point.
Actually, no.Spook knew he was in the wrong.It’s why he’d been avoiding her.It was presumably why he’d said sorry.
“Girl, you need to talk to him,” Lyra interjected.“But I think we both already know that you’re planning on sticking around.”
She was.It hadn’t even crossed her mind to do otherwise.Spook Mortensen was what she wanted.Their official relationship might be brand spanking new, but she hadn’t been text stalking him for a year to give up because he’d gone on a one night psychotic bender.
“I love him,” Alle murmured into her drink.“I just want to understand.Does that not that make me utterly wet?Shouldn’t I be getting out now, before the hurt he causes gets a million times worse?”
Lyra raised her hands.“If you love him, you love him.Now.Later.Won’t make a difference to how much it hurts to walk away.The only thing that’d make you wet is doubting yourself.I can’t abide ditherers, myself.Chauncey’s a prime ditherer.Own your actions.Fuck what anyone else thinks.Is what he did unforgiveable?Is it a wedge that you’re never going to be able to remove?”
Was it?
“If it is, then bail now.If not… communicate.”
If she was being totally honest, it wasn’t that Spook had been with Xane that was pissing her off.No, the real hurt stemmed from the fact that he’d trusted Xane more than he had her.He’d chosen a sex addict to break his self-imposed vow of chastity with, rather than her.
“I just don’t understand,” she muttered.
Lyra gave her arm another pat.“Sweet pea, I can’t give you the answers.Only he can do that.You know, no one ever said love is easy.And loving a rock star…” She shook her head.“Not what I’d choose, but I’m not you.And, I have to say loving someone like Spook Mortensen—who, please correct me if I’m wrong, doesn’t love himself—that’s a whole extra challenge.Which, is not to say it’s not worth taking a chance on, if you think he’s the one…” Lyra didn’t finish that thought, but turned back to the laptop again.The twitter feed she had open had exploded with pictures of Ronnie on stage with Black Halo.One antic in particular had captured the crowd’s imagination.It showed Ronnie with Xane, the latter having just taken a bite out of one of Ronnie’s bat earrings.“Prepare whatever mental speech you need to.Accept that you’re going to have time on your hands while you wait around for him to finish doing his job.Then, hole up and say whatever it is you need to say to one another.”
“You’re right.I will.Am I okay to stay here until then?”
Lyra chuckled.“Stay as long as you like.You won’t bother me.”
***
Alle headed backstage for the end of the show.She knew they wouldn’t be able to talk yet, Black Halo were due to give a bunch of interviews, but she wanted to lay the seeds of what came next.Spook jolted when he saw her waiting at the bottom of the metal steps.He approached cautiously, his expression tight.There was way too much strain showing around his eyes, which she really didn’t like.
Alle put her arms around him and kissed his cheek.
His T-shirt was wet through with sweat, and his skin clammy.“Sorry, I’m not very nice to hug at the moment.”
“We’re going to talk once you’re free of your obligations,” she said into his skin.“I want answers, Spook.About last night.About several things.”
He nodded.“You’ll get them.I meant for us to talk last night, before…” He glanced shiftily around.“Before everything got derailed.I’m sorry, Alle.”
“I know.”
“I have to go.”
“I know.”
“We will talk.”
He got barked at by Sally, and dragged away.
Alle returned to Ronnie’s van, where Lyra plied her with more tea, and they both sat watching the world climb on the Ronnie Bush crazy train, until a bug-eyed looking Chauncey rolled up and snapped about Black Halo railroading Ronnie into more interviews, and how they were all due back at the docks tonight because of that interfering Kettering woman.
“We’ve got to follow their tour bus.Hell knows what the hurry is.It’s not as if we’re trying to catch the tide.The boat doesn’t sail until midday tomorrow.”He continued to grizzle and gripe about the amount of stuff sitting around on surfaces, before turning his pasty gaze on her.“I take it you’re riding with us?”
“That’s not a problem, is it?I was hoping to catch up with Ronnie.”
“Yeah, well, he’s not here, and won’t be.Off to some meet and greet now down at the docks, which that Kettering woman has arranged.No need for me to come, she says.Except he’s my charge.But of course, there’s no room in the mini bus thing.”
“Ronnie will be fine with the Black Halo guys around him,” Lyra remarked.
“Got a crystal ball that’s shown you that?”
“They’re not talking toBang!and those guys are experienced.Also, Sally Kettering knows what the hell she’s doing.Sit back and lap up the credit, Chauncey.When it’s easy, let it be easy.”She turned to Alle, and added under her voice, “And when it’s hard, fucking bail so we don’t have to deal with your incompetent, lazy, whiny arse.”
After another couple of minutes of snorting and ineffectually picking things up and putting them back down again in the exact same places, Chauncey went outside to, “Do some real work.”This appeared to consist of folding deck chairs and taking down their awning.
“Prick,” Lyra muttered.“Ignore him.Bet you a fiver that Sally Kettering gave him some stern and unsought advice?”
Alle shook her head.“No deal.”From what she’d witnessed of Sally in action, she was a woman who didn’t mince words, or worry about whether people wanted to hear them.She was efficient, dedicated, and used to wrangling egotistical metal heads into shape.Chauncey, meanwhile, was a dweeb in a suit.No wonder he looked like he was about to cry.
