Page 86 of The Shape of Your Heart
As I hide my apprehension at making the trip alone, excitement flickers through me. ‘As ready as I’ll ever be. Want a hand?’
‘Thanks.’ She passes me a box. ‘We have a ridiculous amount of stuff – but that’s children for you. We have airbeds, too.’ She rolled her eyes. ‘The boys insisted – even though they only need them for tonight. I can’t thank you enough for this. I had a humdinger of a row with my mother last night. She basically told me I was a terrible role model for my children and they’d probably grow up with all kinds of problems.’
‘That’s outrageous.’ I frown. ‘And so wrong.’
‘She likes to be the best at everything,’ Tanith says bitterly. ‘By telling me how rubbish I am, it makes her feel better about herself. But the worst has been having nowhere else to go, when it’s hardly my fault that I can’t afford a house around here.’
‘Prices are crazy,’ I say feelingly, thinking of the market for second homes. ‘I’m really glad you have a few weeks away from her.’
‘And I’m glad you’re going,’ Tanith says more gently. ‘You need this, don’t you?’
‘I really do.’ It’s true. Doing this walk feels like some kind of turning point.’
* * *
We help the boys inflate their airbeds in the guest bedroom and eat giant pizzas together. When I cut the cake I’ve made them, they shriek delightedly.
‘They’re great kids,’ I say to Tanith when the boys eventually go upstairs to bed.
‘Thank you.’ She shakes her head. ‘They’re exhausting at times, but they are these joyous, vibrant little souls and I just love them.’ She pauses. ‘Thank you for this. The boys and I really appreciate it.’
‘Stop thanking me,’ I tell her. ‘Anyway, you’re doing me a favour.’
* * *
Early the next morning, when Tanith takes me to the station, she eyes my rucksack. ‘How can you possibly have enough stuff for six weeks?’
‘I have to carry it – that’s how. I have everything I need in there.’ I think of my dad’s compass, nestled in one of the pockets. ‘Can you give my parents a call? Tell them you saw me on to the train?’
‘Of course I can.’ She hugs me.
‘OK. I’d better go or I’m going to miss it.’ I glance into the back of the car. ‘See you guys. Look after your mum.’ I kiss Tanith’s cheek. ‘Thanks for the lift. I’ll let you know when I get there.’
A few minutes later, I’m on a train. Watching the countryside flash past, I know Sasha won’t be expecting me to go without her. On cue, her face flashes up on the screen. I let it go to voicemail. This is taking all my courage; I can’t risk anyone talking me out of this.
32
NATHAN
Taking medical advice, I tell myself I need to ease up on work. But the camping project doesn’t feel like work. It’s fast becoming something I feel passionate about. Lying on the sofa with my laptop perched in front of me, I peruse websites, educating myself about Cornwall’s flora and fauna; wishing I was sharing this with Callie. Then looking for a similar model, I start searching for other sites.
It isn’t long before I find what I’m looking for. It’s almost exactly what I want to create – in a similar location. Hoping to get some tips on how they got planning through, I send them an email.
Now that I’m gathering information, at last I feel I’m on the right track. Newly invigorated about my plan, I drive to St Ives to meet Rick and Gina, who started something similar a couple of years ago. Far enough away that we’re not in competition with each other, they’re happy to answer my questions.
Gazing around the field, where several bell tents are set in their own area of garden, I start to imagine how mine could look. Rick and Gina suggest suppliers, but the high point comes when they introduce me to Simon, the friend who helped them get their planning application through.
After fixing a date for Simon to come and see me, as I drive home, I’m starting to feel hopeful.
More than once I wonder how Callie and Sasha are getting on, until later on, I take a phone call from her mother.
‘I don’t suppose you’ve heard from Callie, have you?’ Diana sounds anxious. ‘Only she isn’t answering her phone. I think she’s probably still upset about Sasha.’
My ears prick up. ‘What about Sasha?’
‘She broke her ankle – the day before they were due to leave. Terrible timing. She’s awfully upset. We’ve both been trying to reach Callie, but she seems to have gone to ground. I just wondered if there’s any chance you might have seen her.’
I’m taken aback. ‘She came here a couple of days ago, but she didn’t mention anything about Sasha.’
