Page 93 of Replay
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“Luthor.”Xane was examining himself in the mirror when his lover entered the dressing yurt they’d been assigned by the festival staff.He’d spent a long morning with Spook, talking a bit, but mostly just hanging in companionable silence ahead of the proverbial shit hitting the fan.It would.He knew it would.They both did.Xane was braced for it.No one was going to be happy.A fact that was going to be made worse by the fact that he refused to regret anything.Some things were inevitable, and he and Spook was one of them.
It didn’t mean this was going to be any easier.He’d hoped it could’ve been delayed until after the gig.No such luck.Luthor had got a glimpse of him.The onslaught of questions that were to come were already making the temperature in the tiny hut stifling.The dull thud of tension that had been lingering in his temples upped tempo and started hammering.Xane cautiously bowed to pick up his shirt, and winced at the sudden stab of pain in his sinuses.Equally gingerly, he straightened and pushed his arms into his shirt sleeves.
Luthor stayed his hands before he got close to fastening it.Instead, the two sides of fabric got peeled apart, and his lover’s mismatched eyes narrowed as he made a thorough inspection of the damage to Xane’s skin – a myriad of purple and brown splotches across his torso, and a black ring of hickies around his neck.It was pretty clear what he’d been doing.
“I suppose there’s no point in asking where these came from.My guess is that the answer’s sitting next door.”
They hadn’t deliberately separated themselves.Rather, they’d automatically divided and assigned the three dressing rooms in the way that felt natural.Xane with Luthor, Spook with Ash, and their guest star Ronnie in with Rock Giant.
Had anyone actually communicated that to Ronnie?
Probably not.
Luthor rode his thumb over the darkest of the bruises at the junction of Xane’s collarbone and throat.“Do I get an explanation as to why you look like you were attacked by a vampire coven?I don’t recall Alle saying anything about supernatural monsters when she stopped by to get you last night.”
“He’s not a threat,” Xane responded, hoping to allay what was likely to be Luthor’s biggest fear immediately.Unfortunately, the response had precisely the opposite effect.Luthor’s expression grew even more drawn, and he pressed a little too hard over one of the bruises, making Xane wince.
“What the fuck!”he hollered.His eyes narrowed down to slits.“I’m guessing from that remark coupled with the lovely text you sent.”—he dug around in the pockets of his cargo shorts for his phone to display the message Xane had sent last night.“That you didn’t just snog.”
Guilty as charged.And he wasn’t going to pretend otherwise.What he did wish was that he had a sensible explanation.Alas, he didn’t have that.The only explanations he could offer were scant on detail, and abstruse by virtue of the fact he refused to betray Spook’s trust.
Luthor’s splayed hand tightened across the front of Xane’s throat.“I want an answer, Xane.A truthful one.I deserve that much.”
He did.Absolutely.“Yes,” he admitted.
The pressure on his throat grew instantly as Luthor squeezed, and in a fit of pique, threw him off.Xane toppled sideways into the dressing table, sending various supplies rolling.
“Yes?Yes – what does that mean?You more than kissed him?”
Xane nodded.
Luthor threw a mug at his head.“You fucked him?Is that seriously what you’re admitting to with that paltry yes?”
“Yes.”
This time a can of hairspray clocked him on the temple.Xane raised his arms a fraction too late.
“You utter fuckwit!”Luthor roared.He shoved his phone screen into Xane’s face again.“You know, when I saw that text, I thought maybe he’ll think better of it.Or that I was just interpreting it wrong, and you were about to drop a few tabs or something equally moronic.But, no.It meant the obvious, that you were thinking with your dick again.The same as you always do.How fucking could you?”
Many were the occasions when he could rightly have been accused of just that, but this wasn’t one of them.“It wasn’t like that,” he blurted.Last night hadn’t been about him.Shit hadn’t taken his emotions on a nosedive.His addiction hadn’t overwhelmed him.Everything had been about Spook, from beginning to end.“Luthor, whatever you think happened.I promise you, it wasn’t like that.”
“Really?”A dry chuckle left his lover’s throat.“You didn’t screw him, then?”
Actually, no.The truth, on the other hand—that he’d made love to him—would go down worse.
“It’s complicated, Luthor.He needed me.I didn’t do it to upset you.”
“I doubt you were thinking much of me at all.”
That again wasn’t true.He had thought of both Luthor and Dani.Before.During.And afterwards.
“Please.Don’t start spinning me a load of bollocks.He needed you, right?I’ll expect an orderly queue to form every night, shall I?I’m sure there are plenty of groupies out there who absolutely need you too.I don’t suppose it occurred to you while you were screwing around that maybe Dani and I need you?”
“Stop it,” he hissed.“Stop it.”They were not having this conversation as if he’d just picked up a random guy or girl off the street.They weren’t.“I was with Spook, not somebody else.It wasn’t some meaningless hook up.”It might all seem like semantics to Luthor, but it mattered.It really did.What had happened last night wouldn’t have occurred with anyone else.No matter what Luthor presently thought, Xane was committed to their relationship.Deeply committed to it.“A lot of shit hit the fan for him.It’d been building since Genoa.”
Of course, it’d been building way longer than that, but Genoa had certainly been a flashpoint, and one that Luthor would hopefully recognise.
